From mdb @ Thu Apr 24 01:39:11 1997
Date: Sat, 25 Jan 1997 15:08:52 -0500 (EST)
From: "Melissa D. Binde" <mdb @>
To: Linda Binde <72704.3367 @>
Subject: <TITLE>This SWILnews #1 best read with Netscape 3.0</TITLE> (fwd)

This is the first SWILnews we wrote this year....

Melissa Binde -- binde @
Outside the Asylum --
Always check for your own existance before trying to change your password.
Otherwise, results are unpredictable... -- Geoff Noer

---------- Forwarded message ----------
Date: Sat, 25 Jan 1997 14:58:12 -0500 (EST)
From: Snibor Eoj <jmrobins @>
To: "" < @>
Subject: <TITLE>This SWILnews #1 best read with Netscape 3.0</TITLE>


Warning: Do not read with Microsoft Internet Explorer! It will cause your hard drive to die, your fan to disintegrate, (your keyboard to be covered with Coke -I), and your cup-holder -- I mean CD tray to fall off.


<A HREF=">woowooo</A>

{if (MIE) melt = hard drive; | xrt! xrt! xrt!}

We'd like to live in the block on ML 3rd.
Block that kick! Block that kick!
SWIL is one of the building blocks of a responsible college campus. (We provide a counterexample? -R)
So's this for H&R Block or what?
Block? So that's what they're calling it these days!

Not as annoying as the blink tag; only every other letter blinks!

<IMG SRC="norman.rockwell.beating.up.a.child.gif"> We thought you might like to see it.

Yerba! (Yerba??? -R)

(THOK! R. is bonked on the head by I. and ceases)

He smelled like peppermint and lime jello. His words were kind if you couldn't hear them. His propensity for humor made him most excellent target practice. We shall long mourn the passing of our dearly beloved who are gathered here today to unite in holy matrimony these two
Unfortunately the other two presidents forgot with whom they were dealing...

Aha! Have at you, knave!
Alas! Fie upon thee! A pox of chicken upon your children and your children's children and your children's best friend!
Do you by any chance have six fingers on your left hand? Why yes! Die scum dog! OH NO, Not again!
No, I have six fingers on YOUR hand.
That's not my hand!
Fb, lbh xabj ubj gb hfr EBG-13, ru? Naq lbh gubhtug lbh zvtug svaq fbzr vagrerfgvat fghss urer, ru? Uzzz...

Look, it's a ruffled grouse!
So how's the weather?
I like traffic lights.
Suppose that there exists an epsilon ball about a deleted region of the origin. <DEPRAVED> Why don't we have sex with it? </DEPRAVED>


<EVENT Type=Inauguration Date=Yesterday>

It occured. Attendance was good. Food was good. Weapons were non-existant and therefore not good. But there WERE the darts... (Oops -A) There was game-playing. There was filk-singing. Much frivolity occured. Nobody lost an eye to a dart.

Many names were considered for the new administration. Some of the popular ones which were not chosen:

<LI>Kill Kill, Hate Hate, Murder Murder Mutilate
<LI>James & The Giant Peach & Frank
<LI>Riki Tiki Tembo No Sa Rembo Chari Bari Ruchi Pip, Peri, Pembo
<LI>Kosh, Kosh, Kosh: We are all Kosh
<LI>WWI, WWII, Monday
<LI>Prisons, Madness, & Sexualitiy (French Lit 68)
<LI>Peter, Touch my nose, Wong
<LI>Who are you?, What do you want?, Do you want fries with that?
<LI>Werewolf, There Wolf, There Castle
<LI>Tupperware, Cockroaches, Thermonuclear Missle

Our final choice was eventually made.
Mr. Erik William Rosolowsky shall henceforth be known as Abort.
Mr. Joseph Merritt Robins shall hencefifth be known as Retry.
Ms. Melissa Diane Binde shall hencesixth be known as Ignore.
Nobody shall be known as Frank, Fail, or Influence With Large Hammer.



<SHOWING Week=this>The Last Starfighter</SHOWING>
<SHOWING Week=next>Nausicaa, Princess of the Valley of Winds (Anime)</SHOWING>
<SHOWING Week=sometime>Who Framed Roger Rabbit?</SHOWING>


<EVENT Day=Valentine's Type=Massacre>

Will happen. Sign up happened. We need Waitrons and Thugtrons.
Needed: clothes, caps for pistols.
If you want to participate, contact <a href="mailto:otavia @">Otavia Propper</a> or <a href="mailto:eros1 @">Erik Rosolowsky</a>


<GIBBERISH type=random>
Four horsemen of the apocalypse seen in New Jersey. Details at noon next Saturday.

<EVENT Type=Con Organizers=SWIL>

Many signup lists. To quote: "Sign up to work! Less effort than wallet making in Burma! Just 6 hours per weekend!" (that's what they said! -A.) (They also said you couldn't build Rome in a day! -I.) (We'll show them HAHA! -A.) (No comment. -R) (Sure you don't want to try again on the comment, R.? -I.) (That joke is going to get old, isn't it? -F.)

Seriously: Sign up to work. Necessary. Need people. Mars needs women. No need subjects. Grammar not Zathras's specialty. See Andrea.

We need tables and chairs -- raid the classrooms! Or talk to someone in the college.

Need money from departments -- ask your favorite department to contribute! They all have money, we deserve it. See Andrea for a more politic way of getting it.

We need people to summon the press demons by getting their addresses. See Andrea. (you could guess that part by now -I.)



open ( FILE, "BEM.txt" ) || die "SUBMIT TO BEM OR DIE!";



STAR WARS this coming Friday. If you want to go, email <a href="mailto:ldm @">Larry</a> by Monday.

Tickets will cost $4.50.

People signed up so far are:

Melissa Binde
Joe Robins (paid)
Chaos Golubitsky
Kira Goetschius
Anna Hess (paid)
Jeremy Dilatush
Heather Weidner
David Phillips (paid)
Amy Swift (paid)
Hannah Schneider

Bring your ID when you come.




<SHOWING Length=thon Type=Anime>

It's the ANIMETHON-LITE! 1/3 less grams of reality!

Will be shorter this time. (Less filling, tastes great! -I.)

Date not selected. Tell Larry when you'd like it.

Tell Larry suggestions for films.

We might even tell you how to tell Larry.


Maybe not.



<SHOWING Length=thon Type=Prisoner>

Otavia wants to show the Prisoner. Let her know what eps you want to see if there are any in particular. Let her know if you're interested in watching it and when. Don't tell her about you-know-what. (No no! Please tell me what! -R)

You might find her at otavia @

You might find her at propper @

You might find her at oproppe1 @

You WON'T find her at root @

But you could try!


<SHOWING Length=TV-Show Year=2261 Name_of_the_Place=Babylon_5>

B5 shall be shown at 7:30pm in j7y's apartment as there were no objections (sorry, Elizabeth!).

None this week, however. First showing is 5 February 1997. That will be a new episode. Not a gnu episode. At least, we don't THINK so.... But with JMS, you never can tell....



<LIST Type=Attendance Date=970125>

Alice "The Pierced Wonder" Unger
Otavia "Latin's a dead language, dead as dead can be, First it killed the Romans, now it's killing me" Propper
chaos "end quote" golubitsky
Jessica "orchestra and balcony [ask Alastair]" Harbour
Kira "Wow, there's a gap between the doors." Goetschius
Anna "<*//><" Hess
Jeremy "Seven ways from six" Dilatush
Fluid #2 "Mutant POG - Today the yellow cup, tomorrow the world"
Elizabeth "As a rule of thrumb, one ostrich egg will make an omelet which will feed twenty people -Rules of thumb (it's a book)" Weber
Urban "Jay Scott" Legend
Andrea "Grommett is neither a "C" nor a whole" Hall
David "All hail discordia" Phillips
Blue "I came every week, I've just been invisible before." Clark
Amy "the present" Swift
Larry "Defender of Roger Rabbit" Miller
Heather """"
Alastair "<physics equation in quantum electrodynamics>" Thompson
Will "just another manic SWIL-day, whoa-oh whoa" Untereker
Kendra "Ack-croak" Eshleman
jere7my "Tick @" tho?rpe

Error reading drive C:\
Abort, Retry, Ignore?