/***************/ /* SWILNews #6 */ /***************/ //Would you like to screw your roommate with SWILNews #6?// /*********************/ /* This Week in SWIL */ /*********************/ 1) The next two meetings will be highly informal and may not happen at all, depending on the presence of presidents. If you're interested in attending either of these meetings, e-mail presidents @ swil.org. 2) The first meeting after break will be a discussion of new SWIL activities. Bring ideas and be ready to brainstorm. 3) Nominations/suggestions for Game of the Week should be sent to presidents @ swil.org. Light, fluffy games are best. 4) Movie After Break : Blade II 5) SCHLOCK movies for 2003 are "Attack of the Supermonsters", "Superargo and the Faceless Giants", and "Space Mutiny", assuming we can obtain them all. 6) Start thinking about movies for next fall as well as T-shirt designs. All SWILNewsii: http://www.swil.org/SWILnews/Spring03/index.html /****************/ /* SWILBusiness */ /****************/ It's 2:00 PM on the day of Screw and we still don't have a date for SWILNews #6. Who is still available? How about the rabble? Nah, they're just pathetic and probably wouldn't go to the party anyway. We could screw it with Qian. She's full of ketchup. Could we make it submit to BEM? No, it's already screwed for this year, but we can always plan ahead for next year. We could ask the BEM coeds, they're minor deities. Oh wait, they're not. If we told SWILNews #6 to run around Sharples screaming "Nominate Books, You Stupid Illiterate People!" would anybody care? Is there a future of SWIL we could screw it with? Maybe some of these ideas might help: * More and different activities * Have more and different people run said more and different activities * Clone Abby * Separate organization from social group, make the organization more vibrant * Less of a cult atmosphere * Sponsor events with other groups, like Verti-Go-Go * Everyone put up prop for events that aren't SWILMovie * Bring people to dinner . At the first full meeting after break we will be brainstorming ideas for activities to sponsor. As for now, we've gotten off topic and need to find ways to screw SWILNews #6. We've heard Jim has seen some high class dames. Maybe we can screw it with them. Something important has happened at meeting. /***********/ /* Lottery */ /***********/ Kyra backed out, so we put SWILNews #6 in the lottery. Unfortunately, Jawaad chose a keychain instead. We hope he has fun on Saturday night. /********************/ /* Non-SWILBusiness */ /********************/ We are so running out of Time. What about Cthulu? No... H.P. Lovecraft would never allow it. But he would allow the Sci-Fi Channel to show Degan, a show about him, at 9pm on Saturday. At least if we don't manage to screw SWILNews #6, it won't be bored. We'd better hurry. There's a low pressure system here, and the last thing we need is to screw SWILNews #6 with a munchkin. I know who we can screw him with! Noda, who just had surgery to adopt his true gender identity as a black hole! /***********/ /* Schlock */ /***********/ The top nine Schlock nominees were: Attack of the Supermonsters Superargo and the Faceless Giants Space Mutiny Meteor The Beast of Yucca Flats Bigfoot Doom Runners Cannibal Women in the Avocado Jungle of Death Creature from the Haunted Sea Hopefully three of them, ideally "Attack of the Supermonsters", "Superargo and the Faceless Giants", and "Space Mutiny" will be available. /***************************/ /* Corrections/Retractions */ /***************************/ For those of you classics majors who clawed your eyes out after seeing the title of last week's SWILNews, we apologize. In any event, SWILNews #5 Version 3.0 is an Egomaniac diviSum in tres partes. A recent study has shown that 2 + 2 = Gnu. /*******************/ /* Attendance List */ /*******************/ //The Attendance List of Cedars Falling on Snow// Jillian "Douglas Adams is _so_ hotter than J.K. Rowlings" Waldman Kelsey "Jillian is a necrophiliac/J.K. Rowlings can still actually write and is therefore cooler/da-ang, this is long" Hollenback DOPEY "PERMANENT HOUSEGUEST" GALOSHES M. Jawaad "Not-Quite-Minor Deity" Hussain Ethan "IN A BOX" Sherrard Dan "Omnipotence of things past" Blim =) Jean "excellent opportunity to shut up" Chretien Michael "Handspring Visor is dead. Long live Handspring Visor!" Noda ~Elliot "faith, hope, and charity" Reed Ben "Aaack" Newman benjamin ÔIt will steal your body, and damn your soul' r, george Jim "deaf-muteness means never having to say you're sorry" Moskowitz Nick "I love the smell of cedar in the morning!" Ward Qian "DJ who doesn't talk 8am-930am Mon." Qian J.K. "I am so hotter than Douglas Adams Douglas "Not dead, getting better" Adams Kyura "a useful metaphor... mostly" Jucovy "The late Rachel "Wow, I didn't know they let bad guys into cities too." Sapiro Michael "don't feel like coming up with a good nickname" Cohen Lisa "Petite Quiche" Hunter JC "Sir Tych of Esdragon" Ravage Mark "SLURP" Handler /******************/ /* Smacking Stats */ /******************/ //This Week// ___|_d_|_t_|_w_|tot| _d_|_X_|_0_|_4_|_4_| _t_|_5_|_X_|_6_|_11| _w_|_4_|_0_|_X_|_4_| tot|_9_|_0_|_10|_19| Most Smacks: Time Most Smacked: War //Spring '03// ___|_d_|_t_|_w_|tot| _d_|_X_|_13|_16|_29| _t_|_22|_X_|_19|_41| _w_|_16|_10|_X_|_26| tot|_38|_23|_35|_96| Most Smacks: Time Most Smacked: Death /***********/ /* The End */ /***********/ Thanks to the ape for becoming a special reappearing immediately surrendering guest. Still searching for a Screw date, 3 days later, 3 days later, The Mark of Death, The Nick of Time, and The Ravage of War