Date: Thu, 22 Sep 1994 16:23:57 -0400 To: _swat.org.swil @ cc.swarthmore.edu From: Lesley Tsina (Lesley Tsina) Subject: Parrish Annex Mineral Supplement Sales Guide and SWILnews#3 Rubble clear, wiring sunk, prepare for placement of storage vessels at 09:00 hours. Remember team, if caught you are simply Danish fishermen on holiday. (those of you who took the Scandanavian crash-course help out the other members of the squad) [Geoff Noer this means YOU! -L] Having reached our third week here in lovely Swarthmore Pennsylvania, where the twitter of the birds evading the bulldozers and the happy squeaking of squirrels as they munch on the carcass of a student who got too near one of the backhoes reminds one that the beauty of summer has yet to leave us, we once again turn to thoughts of... SWILbusiness: Hear ye, hear ye. Having reached his third consecutive meeting in this the nineteenth hundred and ninety fourth year of our Lord, and proving himself niether a consumer of questionable pasta nor an animatron of Turing's specifications, it was our great pleasure and duty to declare Sir Fredrick Bush of North Umbria a non-member of SWIL with all the voting powers that be to be conferred upon said individual at such time as there shall be another of the legendary Unnecessary-SWIL-Votes. There is still a ruling pending concerning the sentience of a certain Joe Robins. Tune in this week to find out whether this happy youngster gets the big prize or has to go with what's behind curtain number 2. ["a planarian? " -L] ["Nothing! Absolutely Nothing! STUPID, you're so STUPID!" -TG] [ATTENTION: The previous conversation led to the startling, or rather, Shocking discovery that a certain co-president, and we aren't naming nicknames, has NOT seen that classic of modern American cinema, UHF. Thus, it is our duty to announce that the first SWIL film will be Masclin/feminin by Jean-Luc Godard.. no wait... actually, it will be UHF, provided we ever get in touch with... The SPACE People!!! -TG] By the way, there happen to be six other people who are currently teetering on the brink of dismemberment. These unfortunates include (in no particular order unless your initials are J.M., S.D., M.B., B.W., A.H. or A.U.) Joel McNary, Stephanie Dyrkacz, Melissa Binde, Ben Williams, Aaron Hertzmann and Alice Unger. Prepare yourselves well, yea, as you walk through the valley of the shadow of Sharple's ski-lodge-esque decor. Whatever. We need to decide on a weekend for the Penn Renfaire excursion. Sam and Andrea are heading to Maryland this coming weekend, and will take a few interested others with them -if interested contact either of them by Friday or myself (Literature) for directions. [If an other, please contact the biology department for testing. -TG] [and the english department to have a class held in your name -L] We don't need to decide on a weekend for Penn Renfaire, but certain co-presidents have to pay more attention at meetings. The Penn Rennaisance Festival Trip is scheduled for the last weekend in September. There are a great many people currently on the interested list so perhaps this coming Saturday we can make a "definitely going" list and decide what transportation needs we have. Incidentally, those not already on the "interested" list who wish to go will be flogged for failing to follow procedure. Er... that's not actually true, but wouldn't it be cool if it was? In reality, anybody can still jump at this opportunity, at least 'till the bandwagon breaks since we don't have the budget to supply these band wagons for every single event. [jere7my has already put in a request for one at PhilCon. -TG] So everybody check their calendars and bank accounts and be ready to provide us with the information we desire. Along with discovering a date for Renfaire, we also determined that the Pterodactyl Hunt will take place after October Break, probably on the first weekend in November. So be prepared to be hassled soon by huntmasters Kendra and Fred concerning monster allocation. [I get to be the Sarlac Pit! - TG] [How fitting, you give me a new definition of the word pain! -L] [Two years down, nine hundred and ninety-eight left to go! -TG] [And you thought us co-presidents led dull and uninteresting lives punctuated by reading assignments... -L] [Nobody better puncture my reading assignments! My professors would be pissed! -TG] [and then they'd cause you to find a new definition of the word pain..my, how circular life is when you examine it with philosophical detatchment -L] [actually, I Don't think life is really all that circular. -TG] The final date of the meeting was a determination that PhilCon shall be happening November 18th through the 20th. The beauty of this date is that we have absolutely no control over it! It's governed purely by the tides. T-shirts, those glorious garments the likes of which you have never seen before unless you have been hanging around SWIL longer than a nanosecond, are currently to be found in Beth Bruch's car. Of course, this may prove problematic for those of you in other states of the nation or awareness. Hopefully we will be talking reprints and dino-wear soon, as soon as we get money and requests in and organized.Talk to Besh, she's still responsible for this whole business. Upon last report the George C. Hurliman Memorial Library Memorial Library has now become the United, Socialist, Free Republic and George C. Hurliman Memorial Library Memorial Library of the Proletariat. This is predominantly due to the fact that the workers have seized the keys of production and thrown wide the doors of capitalist bourgoise oppression that had 'till now restrained the good people (volk) from appreciating the fruits of their labors. Those of you who think this anarchic communist development is not a terribly good thing might urge Charles or Tedddd Goundie to find a key and once again contain the rabble. Time for movies shalt be Tuesday upon the tenth stroke of the clock when the moon is in the seventh house and Don has gotten around to the place of cinematic consumption. Stay tuned, we might even have publicity for it. Speaking of publicity, there seems to be some confusion concerning the Minister of Propaganda. Apparently we did choose one, but having nothing in any of the notes taken, we co-presidents are a little foggy on the whole business. Therefore will any Ministers out there please come forward at the next meeting or we will simply have to choose another. Also, we are proudto announce the Quest For The SWIL Server has come to a triumphant conclusion. The said server was found skulking about the Information Super Highway, [BING! -L] where brave, brave Sir Charles cornered it and brought it to heel. It is now on exhibit and can be seen at sc.servers in the student server. Somebody better organize that feast for Charles pretty quick, so we can send him off on another quest. Non-SWILbusiness: Story-reading today (thursday) at 8:30 pm in the PAC seminar room (turn right at the stairs on the 2nd floor) Fun,fun,fun! There was also announcements for all manner of fun, from roundsinging to juggling to Babylon 5 viewing. Also, this weekend there is big fun starting in the Role-playing area. First, at 7:30 on Friday in Dupont's legendary fishbowl Mike Gelman will be starting up his campaign (background and character generation) and then on Saturday evening around 9:00 there will be Fun w' Fred D&D wise in Tarble as he too begins what is sure to be a haapy and joyous campaign. Be there or be elsewhere! That's all for now boys and girls, tune in next week for Literature & The Grotesque's in-depth discussion of The Sacred and The Profane when Don Lehr says... "OK, so there's this God, but how do we know he didn't do the whole creation thing on a bet or something, huh?" And Lesley wittily replys... "@#$$%&*#" ATTENDANCE 9-17-94 Elizabeth "All right then...WAR" Christian, Joeltron the Great - Joel McNary, Stephanie "the cripple" Dyrkacz, Melissa "smarter than a chair" Binde, Beth "or not" Bruch, Annie "AAIIEEEE!!!" Fox, Ben Williams, Frederic "creed (o)f hubris" (it's an anagram!) Bush , Charles of the Rock, Aaron " ? [unfortunately, we don't do backwards punctuation in these parts of speech -L]" Hertzmann, Ross "Never before have I seen 2 people so busy screwing each other that they did not have time for sex" Dickson, Andrea "Why talk? No one listens." Hall, James "hey, _I_ ate the ravioli." [ergo?... -L] Gill, Jay "microbiotic" Scott, Dan "stegosaurus" Levi, Julianna "Master Wizard" Patrick, Alice "In Wonderland" Unger, Mike "mg2x" Gelman, Larry "[TG, YOU CAN TYPE THIS BIT]" Miller [thanks L, but I fear Hebrew characters are a bit more than your computer can handle. -TG], Jeremy "Late but nonetheless still Grand High Muckamuck of Waffles and Glorious Leader of Orange Juice" Dilatush, Samuel "faire!" Weiler, jere7my "You are a lunatic. Go away" tho?rpe, Kendra "Rule #1: Don't send long messages through Keanu Reeves" Eshleman [Rule #2: Don't send Keanu Reeves through the bedrooms of strange women.-TG], Ahyana "_Blue!_" - "My farewell SWIL for the year; I will miss you all profoundly (the ones I don't know I will miss somewhat less)!! B'Shalom!!" - Clark, Geoff "Bwa" Noer [Basted with asparagus? -TG] - Literature &The Grotesque